Toxic Relationships


During Valentine’s day season, love is in the air. Walking to class together, holding hands awkwardly, make out sessions by the lockers, cheating, manipulating, gas lighting. Overtime some relationships turn toxic 

When people watch shows and movies such as Gilmore girls,Victorious, and Twilight. They are exposed to romanticizing toxic relationships through the media. Romanticizing abuse in relationships whether it is physical, mental or verbal in relationships have been shown in films and television, to the point where people start to idolize these types of relationships.

In the Netflix series ‘Gilmore Girls’ created by Amy Sherman-Palladino. The main character Rory Gilmore got into her first relationship with a guy named Dean, whom she met on her last day of high school in Stars Hollow. However, although their relationship began innocently, it quickly spiraled into something that was toxic. Logan Barta, Sophomore felt that  Dean, although sweet and loving for the majority of the relationship, constantly took his anger out on Rory.

“What started out as a sweet first romance quickly became toxic. Dean was jealous and possessive. When I first watched it, I thought he was just romantic, but no one should get upset over someone not saying ‘I love you’ back,” said Barta. 

Tania Barnes, Sophomore expresses her feelings of dislikes about Rory and Deans relationship. 

“I felt that even if they weren’t dating for so long, Rory wanted to go out and explore, she wanted to go to Harvard. Dean on the other hand wanted him to be one of her top priorities. When he felt that he wasn’t, he would lash out on her,” said Barnes.  

When in a relationship that makes a person feel misunderstood, unsupported or attacked, are signs of a toxic relationship.When is a toxic relationship, it might not always be easy to notice the red flags popping up. According to ‘Healthline’ some signs of someone who is toxic are lack of support, envy or jealousy, controlling behaviors, dishonesty and resentment. Trinity Davis, Senior dealt with many signs of a toxic relationship.

“When we started dating I didn’t realize that he was toxic until we broke up. During our relationship he would gaslight me and tell me that I was being insecure when we would talk to other people. The reason we broke up was because he cheated on me,” said Davis.

Lorie Cook,mental health counselor, notices many signs of a toxic person and gives advice 

“A lot of times, especially in high school relationships they think that jealousy means that they love them. Jealousy is rooted in insecurity, and it is never good in a relationship. Another major sign is trying to control  their partners every move. About what they wear, who they talk to, and about having to give up a friendship with the opposite sex,” said Cook.

Unhealthy and toxic relationships can lead to a decline in a person’s mental health. It is important to recognize the warning signs of  a toxic relationship. At its core, a toxic relationship is abusive and can damage your mental and emotional health. Toxic relationships can lead to depression, lack of self confidence and mental stability declining. 

Cook explains that when in a toxic relationship it can severely affect a person’s mental health. 

“A lot of times when you are in a toxic relationship you mental health and self confidence takes a beating, People tend to think that maybe they did something wrong, or they start to second guess themselves. So what I tell students is that they can’t control other people, and that they have to realize that it is not their fault,” said Cook.